The Southland's most mismatched set of siblings -- flamboyant Mary Alice and prim and proper Patricia Anne -- are back and ready to boogie in a King-sized story of hip-shaking mayhem and murder most tacky.

At an age when most women are slowing down, oversized, over-the-top Mary Alice a.k.a. "Sister" -- is always on the lookout for the next good time...and the next husband. Now Sheriff Virgil Stuckey is in line to become Sister's Mister Number Four, which has practical Patricia Anne's level head filling to the brim with a million and one prewedding details. But first there is another important occasion the sisters are looking forward to attending: a gala benefit to raise money for restoring one of Birmingham's unnatural wonders, a towering metal monument to the god Vulcan lately fallen into disrepair.

The grand finale is thirty sequined Elvis impersonators high kicking in unison. Enjoying the show from the front row, Patricia Anne and Mary Alice are in the line of fire when one of the dancing Kings keels over dead right into the bandstand. It seems this Elvis clone, one Griffin Mooncloth, has not only left the building ... he's left this life!

At first the sisters figure that the cause of death was a massive heart attack induced by one too many pelvic gyrations. But the unfortunate Mooncloth's very dramatic demise is soon discovered to be the result of a switchblade knife plunged into his back. The plot thickens when the murder weapon is discovered in Patricia Anne's very sensible purse. The perennially law-abiding "Mouse" is understandably all shook up -- and mortified to find herself the prime suspect in this bizarre case of Elvis elimination. And with Mary Alice's well-coiffed head in a sunflower-yellow-and-magenta cloud over her impending nuptials, Patricia Anne's the one who will have to get herself out of very hot water indeed.

• modern mysteries